On Writing; How to take Critique Gracefully

Letting people critique your work is an essential part of writing but hearing criticism can be heart wrenching. Having just recently heard a few extensive critiques on my novel, one by a family member the others by friends, I thought I’d pass on some advice.

BEFORE YOU GIVE THEM YOUR WORK

1.       Do as much as you can to come up with and answer your own questions. I drove myself crazy doing this so there is such a thing as overdoing it.

2.       Writing questions within the piece, while it can be tacky for an official editor, I did this for my own notes and would give these drafts to people and they would answer them.

3.       Make sure the person you are handing your work to knows you expect feedback and what kind. It’s going to be easy for them to just read it and say they liked it or didn’t. I still haven’t figured out how to get people to actually give a critique even after I made it clear, though they may not have any official expertise, they can help me (and my lame spelling and grammar).

4.       I still haven’t mastered the art of giving a timeline for the critique. I had a schedule for one, every two weeks I’d heard about a few chapters. One I got after two weeks that covered the whole book, and one I’m still waiting on after months, which brings me to…

WHILE YOU’RE WAITING KEEP WORKING ON YOUR PIECE. DON’T LET THE FACT A FRIEND IS READING IT SLOW YOU DOWN, this is specifically for among the drafts edits. A final edit you can’t keep working.

 BEFORE YOU MEET FOR THE CRITIQUE

1.       Prepare yourself for some hard to hear stuff. You’ll get hit with a lot of balls in the gut but like dodge ball you have to find a way to avoid getting hurt.

2.       Prepare some open ended questions designed to flush out problems. Examples;

a.       What about the character made you feel he wasn’t developed enough?

b.      Can you point to some examples of when the setting wasn’t clearly stated?

3.       Remind yourself this person is human just like everyone else, they are not all knowing and always right but only you know how you want your story to be.

4.       You should have already written down intentions for your plot, character, etc. You’ll need to keep these in mind and hold firm to them during the meeting.

5.       Remind yourself that your draft isn’t bad it’s good but you want to make it better.

WHEN YOU MEET

1.       Ask for what they liked about the piece first but after a few minutes you have to ask what they thought could have been better. Listen/take notes. Acknowledge what they are saying even if you don’t agree with it. But try and look at your story as if what they are saying is true so you don’t get in an uncompromising rut. DON’T DWELL ON THE REWRITE, it’s going to be different than you think you haven’t had time to think it through or finish the critique.

2.       Don’t get emotional, happy or upset, especially defensive. The person giving the critique is giving advice to their best ability. They are fallible and there’s no reason you have to agree or use it, if you feel it doesn’t suit your story.

3.       Ask open ended questions, especially if you feel the person has come to a fallacious assumption. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked questions and either the one critiquing the piece took it back or I found the comment was different than what I thought. It also helps you better understand the problem, opening up your options, if there is something you have to change.

4.       Pay attention to body language. It’s best to meet in person. This was a lifesaver for me. One of the people who reviewed my piece was tearing it to shreds but was doing it with such passion that I knew he cared about the piece. He was excited. I’d hooked him in my plot even though he felt the writing and characters needed lots of work. I consider that a successful draft.

5.       Keep in mind a lot of the advice you’re getting is personal opinion, choices, and biased. Everyone sees through their own rose colored glasses and advice from one person could be the exact opposite of another. Make sure you stick to your clear intentions.

6.       At the end tell them what helped you and thank them.

AFTER

1.       Celebrate! You’ve gotten through the hardest part of writing. No matter how it went you’re on your way. You know what they say, "a bad dress rehearsal means a good performance."

2.       Save your draft under a new name. I like to attach the date to all my drafts.

3.       Go through each suggestion and consider them carefully, trying them a few times, before you discard them.

4.       Discard whatever you want to.

5.       Remind yourself the person you worked with was doing you a favor, don’t let that get in the way of any relationship. Go ahead and think they’re stupid when it comes to your piece but that doesn’t mean they’re a stupid person. She’s probably a lot of fun once you get a few martinis in her.

I hope this helps people. When you do these things it feels less of a violation than getting fraudulent charges on your bank card, which happened to me today. Ahh!